Lesbian Bed Life Participants Say:
Lesbian Sex Coaching
Intelligent, Compassionate & Empowering Erotic Education And Support For Lesbians++
(including all self-identified women and adjacent non-binary people who love women, or want to!)
A Personal Note About Sex Coaching
From Academy Director Ruth L. Schwartz, Ph.D.
The Pain Of Sexless Marriages
"If only I had found you earlier," my client told me, crying. After years of sexual and touch starvation, she was in the midst of an extremely painful, and extremely expensive lesbian divorce. Now, too late, I had helped her understand some of the real issues.
Would she and her wife have had a different outcome if they had been able to work with me? I can't say for sure, but I do know that understanding the problem is the first step in solving it -- and with sex, that step is hard to come by.
I Went Through It, Too
My own marriage was happy in many ways, but sex was our weak link. For years I thought it would get better. We loved each other, talked about it, tried to work on it. I found a queer sex coach for us, but they didn't help. Finally, after months of avoiding the conversation, my spouse told me she thought she was asexual. Later, it turned out that wasn't the case, but because we couldn't get to the real issue, we divorced.
The Pain Of Sexual Shutdown
I had a different partner who loved my nonsexual touch, but shut down as soon as I started touching her sexually. We felt attracted to each other, but we each seemed to want something we couldn't name, and couldn't find a way to give each other. Her best sexual experience with me was the time when I felt most disconnected from her. She wondered if it was related to her childhood sexual abuse. I tried hard to get her to talk. She tried hard to talk, too. But my hurt, her shame, and our mutual frustration got bigger than we could handle.
The Pain of Fear and Shame
Another girlfriend and I were madly in love, but when we actually got naked, her favorite sexual activity didn't do much for me. I tried to talk to her about it, but it didn't go well. She was scared it meant there was something wrong with her. I was terrified of losing her. I tried to ask for other things I wanted, but those conversations didn't go well, either. I felt quiet despair, and I'm pretty sure she felt confused, scared and ashamed. I was willing to settle for what we had, but she felt something "off," even though she wasn't sure what it was. Over time, the lack of openness ate away at our connection, and we did lose each other.
What's The Solution: Classes vs. Coaching?
I'm proud to say that the Academy's sex classes (listed below) offer information you literally can't find elsewhere, especially for lesbians and queer women. Each class covers material it took me years to learn, from multiple resources. It's information most lesbians and queer people, including most sex therapists and coaches, just don't have.
But I spoke recently with a woman whose 32-year lesbian marriage had just ended, in large part over sex. "We took one of your classes," she told me wearily. "It didn't help."
I wasn't surprised. Sex is complicated and vulnerable. Many of us have been harmed by shame, homophobia and trauma. So, while classes can help you better understand yourself, you're not likely to be able to understand and overcome the pain of sexual mismatch without personal help.
Honestly, if you can swing it, you need both coaching and classes. That's why my 10-hour coaching packages also come with Supporting Academy Membership, which gives you a full year of access to the best lesbian relationship classes and sex classes anywhere in the world.
Am I The Right Sex Coach For You?
Maybe your gut says Yes. In that case, I hope you'll sign up!
Maybe your gut says No, in which case I'd recommend you check out the many coaches available through the Somatica Institute.
If you know you want help, but don't know if I'm your coach, watch the free class below to get more sense of me and my approach.
Learn why sex between women has infinite possibilities -- and how to expand your pleasure in both receiving and giving.
Discover more about what orgasm really is, and how to increase orgasmic bliss!
All Sex Coaches Are Not Alike.
The sex coach my spouse and I worked with told me I should just find other lovers. While I wholeheartedly support that solution for some people, it wasn't for me. "I want to have sex with my spouse," I said, crying. "It's a normal thing to want!"
I wish I had known then what I know now. I studied sex coaching for three years at the Somatica Institute, with Jaiya Ma, and elsewhere, and I now have radical new ways of understanding what sex really is, how it actually works, why it can be hard to keep it alive, and what to do about it.
Why Sex Coaching Is Worth It
Living without sex means living without a huge part of your life energy. Whether you're single or coupled, sex is worth investing in. A 10-hour coaching package costs less than many people spend on a weeklong vacation, and it'll do much, much more to change your life.
If you're in a relationship and sex isn't working, getting sex coaching can save you a tremendous amount of heartbreak and financial expense. The catch is, it needs to be from the right coach. The coach I worked with was queer, caring, and had good credentials, but didn't know how to help.
I'll never know if my marriage would have survived if we'd gotten better support -- but I sure wish we'd had the chance to find out. I also believe my other girlfriends and I could have worked through our sexual challenges, if only we'd had the right help.
Sex Coaching Can Help You Discover:
-- The kinds of touch that really turn you on to give and receive
-- The kinds of thoughts, images and words that really turn you on, and how to share them with your partner
-- Why arousal, pleasure, orgasm, love and politics are not necessarily aligned, and what to do when they're not
-- How you and a partner can connect even when your needs and turn-ons differ
-- Why sometimes working on other aspects of your relationship is the key to having good sex, and sometimes it isn't
-- Coping with the impact of trauma
-- Understanding your unique erotic psyche, sexual love language, and sexual brakes and accelerators
-- How to adapt when bodies change due to aging, illness, or weight gain
-- Why menopause can spark a whole new kind of sexual connection
... and much more.
My current girlfriend and I share an incredible degree of openness. We are highly compatible, but even when we don't want the same things, we find ways to connect, explore, play, and share erotic energy and pleasure. I want this for you, too! And I can help you get there.
A ten-hour sex coaching package with Academy Director Ruth L. Schwartz, Ph.D., costs $4097 and includes all the sex class recordings below, plus a year of Supporting Academy membership, with group coaching and many on-demand lesbian relationship classes, too!
Are Lesbian Bed Life Classes
Right For You?
Want to overcome self-consciousness, shame, poor body image and other blocks to your full erotic aliveness, and feel sexy and at ease in the body you have?
Are you ready to get help understanding and embracing what really turns you on, so you can feel empowered and at home in your erotic self?
Feel uncomfortable giving pleasure, receiving pleasure, asking for what you want, or hearing a partner's feedback? That can change!
Get the sexual spark back, or ignite it for the first time, in your relationship and in your solo sex life, too! Sexual pleasure makes life better :)
Enjoy, claim and appreciate the uniqueness of your lesbian/queer gender and sexual orientation, whether you're a top or bottom or switch, a butch, femme, stud, andro, genderqueer, non-binary, all or none of the above, or just yourself.
Get frank, intelligent, compassionate, knowledgeable lesbian and queer help to have a sex life that really fulfills you, and also helps you be a great lover to any woman. Great sex is a learnable skill, and you deserve to learn it.
In Lesbian Bed Life, classes, you’ll share a journey of sexual healing and expansion
with other lesbians and queer women uniting to reclaim and celebrate our sexuality.
Because Your Pleasure Matters.
Our Pleasure Matters.
Lesbian Bed Life is part of the Conscious Girlfriend Academy,
the #1 global platform helping lesbians and queer women date wisely and love well.
Bedroom Communication
The secret to being able to rock each other's worlds in bed is right here, in these empowering sexual communication tools!
Stop being held back by common barriers to making requests, giving and hearing feedback in bed, so both of you can get more fulfilled.
Female Sexual Anatomy of Pleasure/How to Make Love to a Woman
It's not just about the clitoris and the G-spot! Did you know there's an A-spot and a P-spot, too? Learn how amazing female bodies are, and how to maximize your own or a GF's pleasure.
Oral Sex & Energy Sex
One of our all-time best sellers, this class is a must-watch whether you're newly out or a lifelong lesbian! Viewers call it liberating and life-changing. Learn how to experience and give more pleasure and share the power of sexual energy, too.
Solo Sexual Enlivenment
Erotic energy is life energy, and with or without a partner, it's yours to revel in, cultivate and draw power from.
Learn how to enliven yourself sexually in ways that go far beyond your usual forms of "self pleasure," and how this can improve your life.
90-Minute Video Class
Understanding And Embracing Your Erotic Self
Yes, you can: know what you want, ask for it, feel good about your fantasies, and become a great lover, too! This class will help you understand your erotic love language, and how to speak it fluently -- as well as converse with others :)
90-Minute Video Class
Healing Internalized Homophobia
This class will support you to release the toxic imprint of homophobia. Learn how to more fully celebrate and inhabit your lesbian or queer self, and the beauty of your sexuality and life.
90-Minute Video Class
Sexual Energy & Energetic Sexuality
Learn why cultivating your sexual energy is within your power and the most likely way to become magnetic to women, rather than getting "friend-zoned."
Discover how full-body orgasms and other forms of energy sex can be accessible to you!
90-Minute Video Class
Embracing Sexual and Gender Complexity
Lesbian/queer gender expression can be wonderfully complex! Join us for an affirming and illuminating class.
Learn how sexual and/or gender fluidity can be a gift and source of richness in your life.
90-Minute Video Class
Let's Talk About Gender
Which form(s) of gender expression feel most like you to you? Butch, femme, genderqueer, androgynous, all or none of the above?
Learn how to better understand queer gender in our community, and how to more fully embrace your own unique gender.
90-Minute Video Class
Sacred Sexuality
Learn how the sexual and spiritual aspects of your life can be deeply entwined, and how to cultivate erotic energy as part of a sacred path of opening and transformation.
Discover how your body can be a portal to the divine.
90-Minute Video Class
Free Lesbian Sex 101: Centering Your Pleasure
Learn why sex between women has infinite possibilities -- and how to expand your pleasure in both receiving and giving, whether you're butch, femme, both or neither.
Discover more about what orgasm really is, and how to increase orgasmic bliss!
2+ Hour Video Class
Releasing Blocks to Full Erotic Aliveness
Erotic aliveness is your birthright! Learn what has blocked you from claiming your true sexual power, energy, arousal and pleasure -- and how to release those blocks and expand into the fullness of your sexual self.
90-Minute Video Class
Free! Lesbian Sex 201: How To Be A Great Lover
Most women aren't "plug and play." Instead, we are wonderfully different in what brings us pleasure. Yet there are ways to be a great lover to any woman, whether you've got decades of experience or are a newbie to loving women. Gain confidence and skill from this empowering class!
2-Hour Video Class
Conscious Queer Sexuality & Kink
"Kink" is empowering consensual interaction that can spans a vast range, from psychological to physical power play. It can be sexual or non-sexual.
Discover how exploring kink can be a path of healing and freedom.
90-Minute Video Class
Free! Lesbian Sexual Courage: Expanding Possibilities
with lesbian sexual pioneer Caffyn Jesse, www.erospirit.ca
Why your erotic pleasure may come in surprising ways, and how to explore and erotic ritual, erotic friendships, and more
How to overcome the effects of sexual trauma and shame and claim an erotic life that truly works for you.
90-Minute Video Class
Can't Decide?
Save Money, Empower Yourself
And Get 'Em All.
Or become a Supporting Academy Member for $149/month and get access to every sex class, plus live classes and the Roadmap To Conscious Lesbian Dating & Lasting Love, too.
Lesbian Bed Life Participants Say:
I absolutely loved that zoom session! It was about vulnerability, respect, diversity in desire, while at the same time normalizing our dark side and shame… and honoring who we are. I love the way you reassure the audience and made it safe while acknowledging the pleasure of flirting! This session was exploring limitations in our pleasure just as much as all the possibilities in front of us. The visualization was awesome! Thank you for honoring every aspect of sex without excluding any one.
"I learned so much! Your class was so incredibly validating, normalizing and liberating, even while you taught me that there is no 'normal.' I had no idea I could feel this free! Oh and it also helps me feel sooo much more ready to find a GF!"
"I spent a long time worrying that I wasn't a real lesbian because I didn't feel comfortable with certain activities.
This class helped me realize there is such a big world of possibilities. I can embrace what I do like and even feel open to exploring beyond my current comfort zone."
I just want to express my gratitude for today's class. In the past I have enjoyed intimacy but couldn’t really speak up for myself and my own needs. With permitting myself to say no, I can literally feel my chest/heart opening up and I feel what a difference this will make in my sex life! Such a relief.
Your class was very freeing, yes edgy, but you have a way of breaking the ice, and giving permission that really resonates with me. I think that is what I’ve needed for so long so I can really be my queer self.
"Wow! I truly had no idea how many pleasure spots women have! I can't wait to explore more with my GF. The suggestion to "go to pussy school" was so empowering."
"Wow, where were these classes thirty years ago, that's all I want to say. But better late than never, and thanks for preparing me to enjoy the rest of my life with more lesbian pleasure than ever before."
While the sex was great with my ex, these classes are teaching me that there is so much more! I am overcoming shame and fear and know that I am in the right place at the right time!
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